Taking Control of My Life, The Time of My Life

7:37 PM

“The problem, Lucy, has never been your ability to put other people first, it has been your complete inability to put yourself first.” from The Time of My Life by Cecilia Ahern

You can find it on page 307 of the book. There are several statements I could quote from the book, which by the way I could relate to, but this one makes me so really relate. A special someone, uhm, I mean a former special someone told me to love myself more, to put myself first before the others. My reply to him was, “I am happy with what I am doing. I feel guilty if I put myself first before the others, specifically, before my family.” I took his words literally, putting myself before the others, how could that be possible, they need me. Okay, stupid me, or should I blame it to my ability of thinking too much and analyzing statement word per word. Thanks to my slow processing of words when it comes to this kind of statement which is contrary to my being impulsive, or not really?

"What do you dream about, Lucy?"
Well, Lucy, the protagonist in the 486-page book The Time of My Life seems to live with lies. Before you judge her, or my words, she lies because she has to hide things from others, well obviously you know and I know that is the reason. The lying starts when her 5-year relationship with Blake ends. Everybody knows Lucy is the one who breaks up with him; some of their common friends think she cheated on him. It is actually Blake’s idea to tell to anyone that she is the one who called it off, and she just allows it, but not on the cheating part. It is not her who left him; Blake is the one who dumped her, sorry for the word, but yes he dumped her. He suggests it if Lucy is not comfortable telling others that he left her. The reason why Blake broke up with her is also the one I have to find out because I just put my bookmark on page 313 as of writing this.

Okay, it is better if you buy the book and read it yourself to understand the whole story. It actually makes me laugh and relates to some parts to which by the way made me emotional at times (pathetic me, haha), and gives me hope at the same time. It helps me fully understand what does putting myself first before the others and loving myself more mean. It means to pursue my dreams and not depend them on others. It also means to take care of myself and believe in my abilities (which means I'm bringing back self-esteem and self-confidence after I lost it for more than a year). Most importantly, it shows me my way to “life”, my own life. It may be a book or a story, or maybe I am just being emotional; however, the truth is in almost 3 months of realization after the one of the most devastated events in my life I finally come to my senses. I finally understand why things went wrong: I forgot that I have my own life to control to. That is why when I came across the statement I quoted in the beginning of this post I know it is exactly the answer I am looking for.

The Time of My Life is an inspiring novel that revolves around the funny, sort of miserable story, and journey of Lucy to get her “life” back. Grab your copy now and join Lucy in finding her way back to her life.

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